BREAKING: ALEX JONES IN NEGOTIATIONS WITH CNN FOR NEW SHOW

BREAKING: Word has leaked out that CNN plans a reboot of their old ‘Crossfire‘ debate program with the intent of capitalizing on the record ratings gained by the recent appearance of Alex Jones on Piers Morgan’s program. While some details remain sketchy, the story is all but confirmed just by taking a look at some of the promotional materials being passed around by CNN employees.

This all broke with a series of tweets from Anderson Cooper and the Obama Phone woman.

CNN president, Jeff Zucker, reportedly lol’d but then tweeted, That’s it, “we can now kill 2 birds w/ 1 stone.” Jeff later clarified, “With Alex, we have someone who is not only TV gold, but can articulate the conservative message with energy and passion. We’ve been looking for someone who can demonstrate clearly to the American people, ‘That’s conservatism.'”

Sending a shockwave across the media industry, negotiations are reportedly in place for Crossfire 2.0 to be pan-network with talent on loan from both MSNBC and FOX. The leaked promotional photo indicates that Al Sharpton has been chosen as the perfect representative of the Left to counter Alex Jones on the Right.

CNN, always at the forefront of technology, is expected to finally integrate their hologram technology to include Geraldo Rivera and Rachel Maddow as impartial moderators and to introduce each segment.

This has all been a triple blow for Megyn Kelly. A big fan of technology and no fan of Geraldo–already rejected as the next Hitchcock love interest in the hotly anticipated Showtime docu-drama about the remake of Vertigo–Megyn confessed she was distraught having always fantasized about being a hologram. “There will be a tangible lack of estrogen if Rachel Maddow is confirmed,” She tweeted.

Megyn has reportedly taken solace from Fox execs who have assured her that she will be holographically embedded with UN forces in the hotly anticipated invasion of Iran, Summer 2014.

No word yet from Alex Jones.

This work is intended as double disinformation of the New World Order. In other words, satire. A special thanks to http://www.coroflot.com/mjwalters for image assistance and for being such an excellent gate keeper.
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